Change

I cleaned out my pool locker the other day - the one that has stored half my bedroom this past summer. As I did so, my mind raced through all my lessons learned from... CHANGE.

I have cleaned out 6 other pool lockers after a summer of work. It honestly wasn't hard to dump it all into my bag and rip my name-tag off the front. Matter of fact, one of the other lifeguards asked how I could do it so quickly without even a glimpse of hesitation or reflection. It sounds silly, but that is a big accomplishment for me! I will admit - it hasn't always been that simple! I hated making new friends every year in school. I get antsy when I don't have a set schedule. I struggle with goodbyes (for the longest time, I avoided them). I panicked over changing my summers plans to accommodate working as an EFY counselor last summer. I stress over new school schedules each semester. I pace over trying new things. I dread opening my pool assignment every year knowing that I would be at... once again... a different pool.

Why is that my nature? - Well, let me tell you, it's not because I have been scarred by these changes! On the contrary actually! For instance: I had MANY friends after my annual hunt for new ones and I can pretty much talk to anyone because of it. My antsy attitude towards "free time" has driven me to accomplish much with the time I've been given. I've gotten goodbyes down to an art - focus on the time you HAD, not the separation ahead. I LOVED my experiences as an EFY counselor and my much-needed-break from swimming. I end up loving every single semester of school. I get a wonderful adrenaline when I try new things. And I learn to love a new staff each summer when I work at a different pool.

To be honest, CHANGE has made me who I am! It has made me better. It isn't always easy - matter of fact, it never is. It's far from my favorite thing. I curse it sometimes. But after the fact, I always am so grateful for it!

So do I take time to focus on the end of another summer gone as I clean out my locker?!? Do I fret over where I will be next summer?!? Do I worry I will never see the people I have grown close to? - Nope. There will always be next summer. Even if I'm in a new place, I know I'll love it (just like every time). And friends are something you never really loose - only things you can collect!

You ask, am I looking forward to the big CHANGE that is going to take place in the next month? - You know, moving away from everything I know... Um, I'm not sure! Haha! I can say that I have mastered this whole CHANGE thing, but it's a lie - it's impossible; once you get comfortable with it, you are faced with something not-so-comfortable. That is how we grow. That is how we become better, stronger, more faith-filled, patient, loving, and courageous. But since I know that, I know that no matter how much of this CHANGE stuff I have ahead of me, I will be okay, and in the end, I will love it.

In the mean time, onto packing a much larger version of my pool locker... my room. Now if I can only do it with just as much courage and confidence as I did my pool locker...